tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24217485876526572812024-02-06T18:44:53.605-08:00Ramblings of a slightly deranged SAHM...Stay at home mom (SAHM) by day.....
MOOANNE by night.......Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-13156664000207888782008-04-15T06:32:00.001-07:002008-04-15T06:32:29.286-07:00Hullo rockboobs my old friends.....<p>I know, I haven't posted in ages. Lets just move right along from there shall we....</p> <p>I am <em>finally</em> managing to wean Daniel! At nearly two he had his first (i kid you not) bottle! yay! Go Dan Go! I couldn't believe it, he just took it, he didn't cry or fight me or have a tantrum and scream 'I WANT MOOT!!' at full volume for all the poor neighbours to hear. So now we are down to one moot a day, thank heavens for that.</p> <p>Let me tell you, breastfeeding, while pregnant is not fun. When i found out i was pregnant i had all these intentions of just letting Dan carry on until he was ready to wean himself...that was before the pain started....oh my hairy octopus tentacles!! Imagine, if you will, sticking needles in your nipples....have you got that feeling in your mind....that is what it feels like is happening when you're pregnant and breastfeeding. Who knows why! All i know is that i am not enduring that 3 times a day.</p> <p>So now i am faced with cabbage leaves in the bra and rock boobs. It's quite the most strange feeling in the world really feeling your boobs fill up! Hey, maybe someone should offer breastfeeding as a clever and cheaper alternative to plastic surgery! hahaha. no.</p> <p>Last night when we were getting the boys ready for bed, i accidentally said 'come Dan lets go and have some moot' and he said four little words that made my heart flutter with glee 'I don't like moot!'</p> <p>yippee! </p> Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-78133028157169497812008-01-14T09:57:00.001-08:002008-01-14T09:57:36.650-08:00Pregnancy Tests and Car Dealerships...<p>So Haai!!</p> <p>I know. It's been nearly 4 months since my last post</p> <p>*clair hangs her head in shame*</p> <p>SO, back to the subjects at hand....</p> <p>1. <a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/CarDealershipsareacompleteripoff_111AF/test.jpg"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="136" alt="test" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/CarDealershipsareacompleteripoff_111AF/test_thumb.jpg" width="244" border="0"></a> </p> <p> </p> <p>I am pregnant! Hurrah! Un-planned by us, but obviously planned by God (who, as Caleb informed us earlier this evening, made, me, him, daddy, dan-dan and mommy's phone!) So far I have done 7 pregnancy tests, all positive, so i think it's fairly safe to say that i am indeed pregnant. I am going for my first scan on 30 Jan, can't wait!! So that means we now need not one, not two but THREE car seats, which means that we need a bigger car, which brings me to the second part of the subject of this post.... (how smooth was that transition???)</p> <p>We own a storm blue, Feb 2005 model, 1.6 16v Scenic II Authentic. It is in very very good condition and has done just over 100 000kms. We decided we should look into either a Kia Carens, Mazda 5 or Grand Scenic. </p> <p>Mazda 5 </p> <p> </p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/CarDealershipsareacompleteripoff_111AF/mazda5jpg.jpg"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="170" alt="mazda5jpg" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/CarDealershipsareacompleteripoff_111AF/mazda5jpg_thumb.jpg" width="244" border="0"></a> </p> <p>This is a very lovely car with lovely sliding doors and 3 rows of seats. It costs about R209 000 which is acceptable. We go to the Mazda dealership and get helped by the friendliest most knowledgeable sales man i have met in a long time. He showed us how the car works, how the seats fold, let the kids jump around the car and even chatted to Caleb like he was important! He promised to phone me first thing Monday morning (today) and sure as eggs he did! SO, off i went for the test drive today, the car is really excellent, the only complaint is that the window buttons are chrome and look a bit crappy. He then set off to do the valuation of my scenic (Sally) they were gone for ages, and the caucus emerged 45 minutes later and offered me a measly R60 000!!!! The book value is R112 000!! Apparently that is what Renault offered them for the vehicle. He then proceeded to tell me that Renault have the worst re-sale value and that i should get out of owning a Renault as soon as possible. He also told me that Renault would be closing it's Pinetown branch soon as there is soon to be only one Renault Dealership in KZN......I have no idea if that is true or not. He then very kindly, offered to give me an R8000.00 discount. Sorry for you mate, we can't afford to buy your car unless you settle it for us!! </p> <p> </p> <p>Kia Carens</p> <p> </p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/CarDealershipsareacompleteripoff_111AF/kiacarens.jpg"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="123" alt="kiacarens" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/CarDealershipsareacompleteripoff_111AF/kiacarens_thumb.jpg" width="244" border="0"></a> </p> <p>We arrived at Kia, and had a look at the Carens, it's also a really excellent car and seems like fantastic value at R214 000. It has leather seats, airbags, abs etc, parking sensors and of course the all important 3 rows of seats, and comes standard with roof racks! The sales lady was also extremely helpful and showed us how everything worked and did a valuation of our car for us while we were looking at the new one. She too promised to phone me on Monday morning (today) with the valuation and to arrange a test drive. She never did phone back. I eventually called her at 3 this afternoon and she said that she was still waiting for the settlement figure to get back to us. I am going for a test drive on Wednesday morning, will let you know what it's like!!</p> <p>Renault Grand Scenic 2.0 Dynamique</p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/CarDealershipsareacompleteripoff_111AF/grandscenic.jpg"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="184" alt="grandscenic" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/CarDealershipsareacompleteripoff_111AF/grandscenic_thumb.jpg" width="244" border="0"></a> </p> <p>We arrived at the Renault dealership (bear in mind that we all ready own a Renault and always take our car to the dealership for it's services) we milled around for ages until someone came over to 'help' us. He had absolutely NO idea how the seats folded down or up, or how to set up the extra seats in the back. When we asked him if it was safe to put a car seat in the extra seats in the third row, we just got a completely blank stare and he disappeared off for about half an hour and came back with a Renault brand car seat (he thought we were asking him about the car seat not the actual seat in the car!) Another sales rep arrived and promptly tried to 'help' me fit our car seat in the back and just made it more and more tricky. The original sales rep just disappeared off the planet. He then sat down with me and tried to do a valuation, but he couldn't because he didn't have the right piece of paper or some other nonsense. He told us to come back on Saturday morning to have the valuation done. Which we did. We arrived and waited around for well over an hour while someone took the car for a drive. The sales manager then had the absolute cheek to ask us if he should 'try' and arrange more than our settlement figure for the car. DUH!! We owe much less than the car is worth. He then told us that he couldn't complete the valuation because the guy wasn't there. He promised to call me on Monday (Today) with the valuation figure. Of course, he didn't and i ended up calling him at about 4. He informed me that the guy who does the valuations wasn't there. This was after 5 minutes of him not remembering us even coming in on saturday!! He then told me how much money he made over the Christmas period and how happy he was to work over Christmas because he made soooo much. He then promised to call me tomorrow. I was so put off by the awful service! I don't even like the grand scenic and i think it's just because the service has put me off! It is a lot more than the other cars at R241 000. Lets just hope that they give us a really excellent deal!!</p> <p>I am officially of the opinion that car dealerships are just out to rip customers off.</p> Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-50905676579552280002007-09-01T00:58:00.001-07:002007-09-01T01:04:55.846-07:00Cliff Jennings....<p>So, old Cliff Jennings is a fake. Well all I can say is thank heavens, it means that town hill can relax and un-reserve the next available bed!!</p><p>For anyone to sing that badly, and take himself that seriously would just have been well, for want of a better word...wrong! His singing was horrendous and as for his song writing skills...they certainly left a lot to be desired. I mean come on, who would honestly write a song about a 'nubian princess' in any case?</p><p>BUT having said that, he was really entertaining, I'll be very interested to see what they have planned to explain themselves. I'm sure we will see on Sunday's show. </p><p>I'll also be very interested to find out whether or not it had anything to do with the creators of Idols....if it did, then how do we know that any of the contestants are actually 'real'</p><p>And so begins the conspiracy theory...... </p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-30654499027729714452007-08-30T06:41:00.001-07:002007-08-30T06:41:13.483-07:00The drugs don't work....<p>I know, it's been a very long time since I actually wrote a post worth reading, I've not been lazy, it's just that I am so completely sleep deprived that if I did post, it would certainly not be worth reading at all. Promise.</p> <p>Dan and Caleb had their usual mid-August green snot and I took them off to see Dr Manjra, who asked me how Daniel's sleeping was going....I just burst out laughing, and I must have looked pretty darn desperate at that point because he said to me 'Why don't I give you a script for an anti-histamine that has a very 'unusual' side-effect....it makes your child sleep for the entire night. ' I was unsure at first and then, after much re-assurance from Dr M that it cannot harm him at all I warmed up to the idea of having a full night of sleep.</p> <p>I very guiltily decided to give it to him about 3 days later, and it took hours of agonising to actually finally decide to give it to him. (I am one of those paranoid mommies who does not give medicine to her kids unless it is deemed absolutely necessary by Dr B or Dr M) I gave him half the dose recommended by Dr M and put him to bed hoping for the best. We checked his breathing several hundred times and he woke up for the first time at 4am! 7pm - 4am. I was on top of the world, singing happy songs, and seeing little clumps of blue-birds above everybody's head. The most solid sleep I have had since Daniel was born!!</p> <p>Then, we decided to try it again about 2 weeks later, this time I gave him 3ml instead of 2.5ml just because we were having a farewell for my friend at home and I intended to have a few brutal fruits. 11pm....he woke up, 12 he woke up, 2am he woke up, 3am he woke up. Why me?</p> <p>After that we have tried it one more time, this time I also gave him 3ml, and he woke up at 1am, 2:30am and 4am. He also got up while I was trying to put him to bed and hobbled around the bedroom!!! </p> <p>Will I ever be able to sleep?</p> <p>Why does he hate me so?</p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-83073286448857659492007-08-30T06:06:00.001-07:002007-08-30T06:06:56.906-07:00This post contains nudity.....<p>The boys had their best bath EVER last night. They just played and played and played until the water got cold, and then we added some more hot water and they played some more!</p> <p>Man I love my kids!!!!!</p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00155.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="180" alt="DSC00155" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00155_thumb.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a> </p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00159.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="180" alt="DSC00159" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00159_thumb.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a> </p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00174.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="240" alt="DSC00174" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00174_thumb.jpg" width="180" border="0"></a> </p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00172.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="180" alt="DSC00172" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00172_thumb.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a> </p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00160.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="180" alt="DSC00160" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Thispostcontainsnudity_D38B/DSC00160_thumb.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a></p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-5800664847707678272007-08-20T14:21:00.001-07:002007-08-20T14:21:19.836-07:00My Dan-Dan<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/1600/image-upload-76-779378.jpg"><img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/300/image-upload-76-779378.jpg"/></a><br /><span>*gush* thats my boy!</span><br /></div>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-46592552623598006742007-07-31T13:57:00.001-07:002007-07-31T13:57:02.943-07:00Bugger, bugger, bugger, bugger, BUGGER.<p>You know when look back at a day that you've endured and feel like sinking into a hole??</p> <p>I joined Virgin Active gym yesterday (Monday) so that I could start doing a bit of exercise to firm up the jiggly bits, got the clothes and everything and decided that today (Tuesday) should be the beginning of my new era of fitness! This is how it went....</p> <p>07:30am get out of bed and put on gym clothes. Try on 16 different tops.</p> <p>07:50am look at hair in mirror....ghastly. Fix hair.</p> <p>08:15am feed baby breakfast - baby sneezes caramel jungle oats all over my gym top. Put on new gym top, try on 15 different tops AGAIN.</p> <p>08:45am feed baby milk.</p> <p>09:00am start heading out the door, scratching madly in handbag for car keys......</p> <p>09:06am get sms from husband 'Love, i've got the carkeys.' BUGGER. Husband works in umhlanga. Spare key has no batteries. </p> <p>09:15am phone Renault and find out how to start car without battery in key.</p> <p>09:30am head off to gym, looking frazzled, baby not happy about being in the car.</p> <p>09:45am arrive at gym, sign baby into 'Club-V' (ie baby creche thingy) and go to changeroom to put my bag in the locker. Forgot padlock. BUGGER. Give all my bags to the lady at the creche.</p> <p>10:00am step onto treadmill, realise that i don't know how to work the thing (touch-screen with isidingo or some crap on it) look casual like (so as not to attract any gym personell) eventually get going. Do a 20 minute run, am starting to really get into it and am now just starting to sweat a bit....</p> <p>10:20am 'Mrs McPhail, please report to the Club-V area immediately' BUGGER BUGGER BUGGER. Press the stop button on the treadmill and rush downstairs.</p> <p>10:23am baby is hysterical, has been crying for 10 minutes non-stop. Try to comfort him but he's just not having any of it. Debate whether or not to just go home and shower...realise, can't shower at home, because husband has remote for complex gate...i can get in, but not out again....have to pick caleb up at 12.....BUGGER. Decide to ask the lady to hold onto screaming baby for 15 minutes while i shower.</p> <p>10:30am Head off to shower, wash hair and body in 5 minutes. put on clothes in 5 minutes....</p> <p>10:35am creche lady appears in change room with screaming baby and stalks off looking cross. stuff you creche lady.</p> <p>10:40am dry hair with, now smug baby sitting on the counter cooing and gurgling happily. stuff you baby, stuff you!</p> <p>10:45am scream out of the gym, up the slated stairs that go over the pool, feel my show come off, my favourite shoe....hear *plop* F*&#!!!!!! BUGGER. Yep. shoe in pool.</p> <p>10:47am walk up to gym staff member. "i just dropped my shoe in the pool. No, i don't want it back' Head out of gym wearing ONE SHOE. Buy new shoes.</p> <p>*some time passes*</p> <p>12:00 pick up caleb, his teacher informs me that he has been a total little toad today. Bugger.</p> <p>Drive to umhlanga, get keys, have lunch with husband. drive home.</p> <p>15:00pm arrive home, eat approx 600grams of cooking chocolate. feel sick. it wasn't even good chocolate.</p> <p>I wonder if i should go to gym tomorrow.............</p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-39996747129200092912007-07-19T06:34:00.001-07:002007-07-19T06:34:35.220-07:00You have been warned...<p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Youhavebeenwarned_DAE8/DSC00218.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="180" alt="DSC00218" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Youhavebeenwarned_DAE8/DSC00218_thumb.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a></p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-85667274988329286922007-07-19T06:30:00.001-07:002007-07-19T06:30:46.843-07:00Heeeeelp!<p>I am so tired that I find myself thinking in circles and talking crap. Okay, maybe i'm just looking for an excuse to 'talk crap' because it's something i do relatively often...ok it's something i do ALL THE TIME.</p> <p>That's totally beside the point.</p> <p>So, what I want to know is:- Who can help me??</p> <p>I've got a 15 month old son, Daniel, he is an absolute cherub...BUT he is a little green devil-monster and night. He goes to sleep with relative ease, but then.....he starts to grow horns and wakes up at round about 12 and then he is a right royal pain in the ass. Unfortunately, he won't go to sleep without having a little drinkie-poo at the mobile-milk bar (me). Which is ok, except now he doesn't want to <em>leave</em> the mobile milk bar, he just wants to stay attached to it all night long, and as soon as I move away from him, he sits up in bed, points at my bosoms and then wails, desperately like he's being murdered. Which means that i am getting, at best 2 hours sleep a night. There is just no way i can sleep which he is sucking on me! I wake up feeling like i've had micro-abrasion on my nipples!!</p> <p>His latest trick is, after being fed, to pretend to be asleep in my arms, at which point i pop him back in his bed, then he sits up, points at our bed, throws his head back and waaaails like only Dan Dan can wail, until he's in our bed and then he requests a little drinkie, by, very subtly, pulling my Pjyama top down! What a F&*()ing liberty!!</p> <p>Yes, i have tried dummies, he can projectile spit them across the room.</p> <p>Yes, i have tried bottles, he is NOT into bottles, he refuses, buttons up his mouth and screams blue murder.</p> <p>If my husband picks him up at night when he wakes up, he screams and throws a massive wobbly. </p> <p>We don't agree with 'controlled crying'. </p> <p>Does anyone have any suggestions??</p> <p>Please?</p> <p>*rocks self gently*</p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Heeeeelp_D7E6/DSC00228.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="180" alt="DSC00228" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Heeeeelp_D7E6/DSC00228_thumb.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a></p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-42334289964110758762007-06-22T13:15:00.001-07:002007-06-22T13:15:51.671-07:00Scrubs Dr Cox opinion on weight loss....<p><em>an overweight patient has not been losing weight, despite Dr Cox's orders]<br></em><strong>Dr. Cox</strong>: Lemme ask you a quick question: are you trying to make my head explode? Because you have no idea just how frustrating it is working your ass off trying to inflate a tiny little balloon inside somebody's clogged artery when all that person has to do, really is - oh, I don't know - go for a walk in the morning or choke down a fresh green salad. And you come back here looking like that? And, I know here, I know I'm supposed to be Dr. Give-A-Crap, but you wanna hear the God's honest truth? And this is a fact: you are what you eat. And you clearly went out and devoured a big fat guy, didn't ya? <p> <p><a href="http://www.coxisms.com" atomicselection="true"><img height="240" alt="cox" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/ScrubsDrCoxopiniononweightloss_136C5/cox.gif" width="178"></a>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-51949666640749648402007-06-11T14:15:00.001-07:002007-06-11T14:15:39.034-07:00Me giving Dan a driving lesson. <div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/1600/z/602874/image-upload-142-737993.jpg"><img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/300/z/90807/image-upload-142-737993.jpg"/></a><br /><span/><br /></div>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-37577555469819753302007-06-01T11:58:00.001-07:002007-06-01T12:02:29.166-07:00Confessions of an ex-fat person ;-)<p>I went into the changeroom at the brand new spangly woolies today with a pair of size 10 jean pant to try on and a pair of size 8 jean pant to try on. Size 8. Let me just take that in......</p> <p>The size 10 are too big. The size 8 are snug, I don't like snug pants, I'm terrified of someone going OH MY GOODNESS who gave that hippopotamus permission to get into those tight pants. Which means I am a size 9. ha ha ha. what a laugh. The pair of 8 pants I own (the ones I'm wearing in the before/after pics in a previous post actually) fit me perfectly, why do different shops make their pants slightly different sizes? I'm convinced that it's just to torture me.<br /></p> <p>So here's the confession. I am absolutely, completely and utterly terrified of putting on weight again. Not to the point where I obsess about what I eat, because I'm pretty good about that, but it bothers me to think that I could probably quite easily put on a few kilos in a few weeks. eek. At this point you're probably thinking that I'm incredibly vain. Maybe I am. But when you have been overweight for about 19 years of your 26 year life, you tend to battle to feel anything different about your body. I can't believe what comfort I used to find in food, now i just don't get that feeling from it anymore which is a really REALLY good thing otherwise i could too easily slip back into comfort eating I think. </p> <p>Lisa said something to me the other day which really made me realise how stupid humans are, we cannot actually mess around with food, we just take it for granted, but stuffing around with it is actually not such a grand plan. (Sorry sweet that's a like total paraphrase) But she's so right, food has consequences!! Put that in your pipe and smoke it.<br /></p> <p>I had to buy a new belt today, (mine wraps around my hips one and a half times) and do you know something, I picked up a medium, examined it carefully, and thought to myself 'there is NO way that will go around me!' I measured it and sure enough, perfect fit, in fact i could have probably gone for the small. I looked at my jeans this morning and thought to myself ' can't believe my legs fit in there.' Why does it take us so long to change our mental/emotional perception of ourselves? </p> <p>Old habits die hard...I suppose.</p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-19899171999255360812007-06-01T00:49:00.001-07:002007-06-01T00:49:26.732-07:00Gratuitous kid photo<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/1600/image-upload-15-765654.jpg"><img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/300/image-upload-15-765654.jpg"/></a><br /><span>Oh my word my dan is THE cutest 13 and a half month old in the universe.</span><br /></div>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-35369950888387277042007-05-26T10:35:00.001-07:002007-06-14T01:36:11.339-07:00The mystical, amazing fantastic SECRET TO WEIGHTLOSS!!<p>I know. It's been ages, never mind, I'm back from my little sordid affair with Mr Gastro and Mr Flu.</p><p>Back to the topic at hand. I am SO sick and tired of hearing the following:- 'Oh, my gosh I need to lose some weight, so I'm just going to cut out carbs.' or I'm not dieting, I'm changing my lifestyle, so I'm cutting out carbs, you know bread, pasta, potatoes etc, all the bad food that makes you fat.'</p><p>WHAT A LOAD OF CODSWALLOP.</p><p>WAKE UP and smell the Low Glycemic Index Bread!!</p><p>My best friend in the whole world is a dietician, and I will ask her to make sure I don't say anything out of line but here.</p><p>I personally feel that, having lost 28kgs in 8 months, I am a relatively good authority on the subject of weightloss. Yes, 28kgs. Now that you've gotten over the shock, here are the before and after pics....</p><p>Before</p><p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/weddingphotos07613.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="BORDER-TOP-WIDTH: 0px; BORDER-LEFT-WIDTH: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM-WIDTH: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT-WIDTH: 0px" height="240" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/weddingphotos07612.jpg" width="103" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN49089.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" height="240" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN4908_thumb5.jpg" width="180" border="0" /></a> </p><p>After</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN61512.jpg" atomicselection="true"><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN61504.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" height="240" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN6150_thumb2.jpg" width="180" align="right" border="0" /></a><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" height="240" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN6151_thumb.jpg" width="180" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN61463.jpg" atomicselection="true"><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN61447.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" height="240" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN6144_thumb5.jpg" width="180" align="left" border="0" /></a> <img style="BORDER-RIGHT: 0px; BORDER-TOP: 0px; BORDER-LEFT: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM: 0px" height="240" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/DSCN6146_thumb1.jpg" width="180" align="right" border="0" /></a></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>RIGHT.</p><p>SO. Basically what I want to say is, if you want to lose weight, for heavens sake, be sensible. Use your brain! Think about something that you learn in primary school.....the food pyramid!! Lets review the food pyramid shall we?</p><p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/foodpyramidportions2.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="BORDER-TOP-WIDTH: 0px; BORDER-LEFT-WIDTH: 0px; BORDER-BOTTOM-WIDTH: 0px; BORDER-RIGHT-WIDTH: 0px" height="167" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Diets.....Weightloss.....carbsareth.aarg_1441B/foodpyramidportions_thumb.jpg" width="240" border="0" /></a> </p><p>(Thanks I took this from this site) <a title="http://www.superquinn.ie/download/1/food-pyramid+portions.jpg" href="http://www.superquinn.ie/download/1/food-pyramid+portions.jpg">http://www.superquinn.ie/download/1/food-pyramid+portions.jpg</a></p><p>It's very, VERY, simple...your diet should be made up of, mostly high-fibre, low Glycemic carbs, then fruits and vegetables, THEN dairy, THEN protein, then fat. </p><p>I'm sure that you are at least a little bit interested in what I did to lose all that weight....well, I'm going to tell you the secret....only, it's not a secret, it's nothing magical, it's nothing amazing, I didn't take any magical fat-melting, fat-blocking, lose weight now tablets, I didn't follow a low carb diet, and live on millet porridge and h'duki beans....all I did, was join <a href="http://www.weighless.co.za/">Weighless</a>, which is based on....THE FOOD PYRAMID. Here is one of my days basic menu:-</p><p>Breakfast</p><p>60grams of all bran cereal </p><p>125ml low fat milk</p><p>1 cup of decaf coffee</p><p>Snack</p><p>1 banana</p><p>1 yoghurt</p><p>Lunch</p><p>4 slices of slim-slice bread made into 2 sandwiches</p><p>filled with, 90grams of cold meat and about a tablespoon of Woolies reduced oil mayo, and some sliced tomato and lettuce or homemade coleslaw (if I have any)</p><p>1 can of coke light</p><p>Snack</p><p>1 Apple</p><p>1 yoghurt coated rice cake</p><p>1 cup of decaf coffee</p><p>Dinner</p><p>Lemon and Herb marinated chicken breasts from woolies (110grams of this)</p><p>salad (lettuce, tomato, cucumber, carrot, little bit of feta) woolies reduced fat mayo</p><p>Woolies microwave in the bag garlic and herb butter baby potatoes (90grams of these)</p><p>1 can of coke light/light juice.</p><p>Dessert</p><p>whatever fruits I have left in my allowance </p><p>if it's cold 1 cup of Cadbury's lite hot chocolate made with milk.</p><p>I also always drink 8 glasses of water a day which is surprisingly easy.</p><p>I would like to point out that I too have tried all the 'fashionable' diets, Dr Cohen, and a low carb diet or seven...they do work...BUT you feel like you want to die, your breath stinks and it is completely, totally and utterly unsustainable, and yes, I put on all the weight I had lost PLUS more.</p><p>The biggest secret to weightloss (in my humble opinion) is to ensure that whatever you do to lose weight, is sustainable. It has to be a life change, you have to be willing to eat a certain way for the rest of your life and that, I'm afraid is all there is to it. I have made that change and I couldn't be happier. We still 'cheat' and have steers once or twice a month and I eat all my chips! We have been to spur a few times and i have had, steak, chips a chocolate brownie and ice-cream, and loved every single solitary mouthful. I do not deprive myself of the things i love (chocolate, and ice-cream mainly) but i have changed my thinking about food entirely, i don't reward myself by having 'something nice to eat' food is not a reward, it's something we eat to sustain our bodies and to keep healthy and also for enjoyment, but junk food is not the only food that is completely totally and utterly delicious. Pink Lady apples are the bomb. Smoothies are your friend, you can conjure up the most divine healthy smoothies really easily and they taste great.</p><p>It is so unhealthy to go a low carb diet, here are 15 reasons from <a href="http://www.sideroad.com/Weight_Loss/low-carb-diet-danger.html">SideRoad.com</a> why you shouldn't cut carbs:-</p><p>"<strong>1. Low carb (ketogenic) diets deplete the healthy glycogen (the storage form of glucose) stores in your muscles and liver.</strong></p><p><strong>2. Depletion of muscle glycogen causes you to fatigue easily, and makes exercise and movement uncomfortable.</strong></p><p><strong>3. Depletion of muscle glycogen leads to muscle atrophy (loss of muscle).</strong></p><p><strong>4. Loss of muscle causes a decrease in your basal metabolic rate.</strong></p><p><strong>5. Your muscles and skin lack tone and are saggy.</strong></p><p><strong>6. Some proponents of low carb diets recommend avoiding carbohydrates such as bread, pasta, potatoes, carrots, etc. because of they are high on the Glycemic index - causing a sharp rise in insulin.</strong></p><p><strong>7. Much of the weight loss on a low carb, high protein diet,</strong> <strong>especially in the first few weeks, is actually because of dehydration and muscle loss.</strong> <p><strong>8. The percentage of people that re-gain the weight they've lost</strong> <strong>with most methods of weight loss is high, but it's even higher with low carb, high protein diets. This is primarily due to three factors:</strong></p><p><strong>A. You have lost muscle. With that comes a slower metabolism which means fewer calories are burned 24 hours-a-day. A loss of muscle during the process of losing weight is almost a guarantee for re-gaining the lost weight, and more.<br /></strong><strong></strong></p><p><strong>B. You re-gain the healthy fluid lost because of glycogen depletion.<br /></p></strong><p><strong>C. It's difficult to maintain that type of diet long-term.</strong></p><p><strong><br />D. You have not made a change to a long-term healthy lifestyle.</strong></p><p><strong><strong>9. Eating too much fat is just not healthy.</strong></strong> <p><strong>10. As someone recently told me, "it must work - people are losing weight".</strong> People that are truly losing fat on low carb, high protein diets, are doing so because they are eating fewer calories - that's the bottom line. <strong><em>There is no magic</em></strong> -<em><strong> the same can be </strong></em><strong><em>done on a healthy diet</em></strong>. <p><strong>11. Low carb diets are lacking in fiber. </strong><p><strong>12. Low carb diets lack sufficient quantities of the the many nutrients / phytonutrients / antioxidants</strong>. <p><strong>13. Americans already consume more than twice the amount of protein needed.</strong> <p><strong>14. Low carb, high protein diets cause an unhealthy physiological state called ketosis</strong>, <strong>a type of metabolic acidosis.</strong> <p><strong>15. Bad breath."</strong> <p>You've got the facts, so do something about it! Don't waste time and money on stupid meal replacements etc. The mystical, amazing fantastic secret to weightloss is.... <p>There isn't one, and more importantly, we shouldn't aspire to be tiny little, skinny little thin little creatures, we should aspire to be healthy, happy, and confident in who we are. </p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com43tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-33121016938620164372007-05-25T14:27:00.001-07:002007-05-25T14:27:27.156-07:00Don't mess with the mama!<p> </p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Dontmesswiththemama_149C6/themama1.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="180" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Dontmesswiththemama_149C6/themama.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a> </p> <p> </p> <p>Today i have two sick boys. Dans got sinusitis and such bad post nasal drip its making him VOM all over the show. Caleb has got sinusitis and pink eye in BOTH eyes, he looks a bit like hes been smoking a bit of whacky baccy. <br>So off we went to the paed which is always good fun. I hate it so much when both boys are sick! I just want to cuddle them both all the time and i dont know who to fix first! I just love these little sprogs so much.<br>At westville hospital, i was trying to get the two snot covered babes into the car after the doctors visit, some asshole pulls half way into the parking next to me and revs his car. I have got both front and back passenger doors open and my bum is hanging out the car while i try and strap the boys in. So i just took my time and he carried on. So i gave him the look and thought to myself DIAF (copyright kevin cadman) moron and carried on. THEN to add insult to injury he was only using the parking next to me to drive through so he could get to the parking in front of it so he could sit and smoke. He then got out his car and checked me out. Men are such pigs. * except Ewan of course.</p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-86985529619796207922007-05-08T12:52:00.001-07:002007-05-08T12:52:03.072-07:00Anti Bullard Propaganda<p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/AntiBullardPropaganda_13351/n704930096_128579_3061.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="120" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/AntiBullardPropaganda_13351/n704930096_128579_306.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a> </p> <p> </p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/AntiBullardPropaganda_13351/n704930096_128578_1711.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="120" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/AntiBullardPropaganda_13351/n704930096_128578_171.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a> </p> <p>Thanks to my dear husband for these.</p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-38262925827938578042007-05-08T01:44:00.001-07:002007-05-08T12:53:08.583-07:00Stuff you David Bullard.<p>If I wanted to be a journalist, I would have become one. I don't give a rats bottom if other people read my blog or not. It is something that I do for me. If you don't like blogs, then just don't read them, they are quite easy to avoid really.</p> <p>Stuff you David Bullard, stuff you.</p> <p> <a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/StuffyouDavidBullard_9603/cowsigngenerator_wwwtxt2piccom2.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="240" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/StuffyouDavidBullard_9603/cowsigngenerator_wwwtxt2piccom_thumb.jpg" width="205" border="0"></a></p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-10171579776520402512007-05-03T11:10:00.000-07:002007-05-03T11:10:29.194-07:00If it could go wrong - it did.....<p>Yesterday was one of those dreadful days.</p> <p>It started out with me going to sleep at about 4am (thanks to tenacious D)and then being woken up by my alarm clock at 5:15. Yes that's just 1 hour and fifteen minutes sleep. Really great.</p> <p>I then had to rush Ewan off to plantations and then rush Caleb to school and rush to the shop and RUSH home again (are you sensing a pattern here?) to get back for my mom's group meeting which was held at my house.</p> <p>Mom's group meeting was really nice and the highlight of my week. I just love sitting with other people in the same proverbial, boat as me. </p> <p>Then i got a phonecall from my husband. My domestic worker passed away yesterday morning, leaving behind 2 teenage daughters. It just hit me like a flippen ton of bricks had been dropped onto my head. The two girls have no idea what was wrong with their mother. She refused to tell them, which makes me wonder if she wasn't HIV+. She went for a test apparently which was negative, but then they sent her for a CD4 count...which they only do if you're HIV positive? In anycase it doesn't matter what she died of, the point is she is now gone and i miss her terrible english and strange sense of humour and even her annoying habits. I am so worried now about her daughters, it SUCKS that some people can be so rich that they have money pouring out of their bums and then there are some people who have, literally nothing. </p> <p>I went to my mother's house in the afternoon for a bit of company, arrived there at about 2 and she was about as sympathetic as jelly-fish. My father is still not speaking to me - all because i go to their house. I went to the shop to get stuff for dinner and couldn't find anything that i wanted. Went to pick up Ewan from work at about 5:00pm....the N2 was closed due to a cash-in-transit heist....i found that out, when i had JUST got onto the N2. Luckily i could get off at Umgeni Road, i got horribly lost and wanted to burst into tears at the poor petrol attendant who i asked for directions. I eventually got to Ewan's office after 6, had to go the LOOONG way home (we all ready live about 40km's from Ewan's office anyway) which means we got to Hillcrest after 7 and then as we went past the Hillcrest turn off, we got stopped by another accident. We got home at about 7:20 (that's 2 hours 20 minutes in the car with the boys) and then they got bathed and got to bed. I just felt so completely drained.</p> <p>Today i'm still feeling so sad about my domestic worker. It really just sucks.</p><p>p.s I have just discovered that the groceries i bought for yesterday for dinner tonight are past their sell-by date. It is now about 8 o clock. I think i will go and set-fire to my hair now.<br /></p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-21815981789662322122007-04-29T14:34:00.001-07:002007-04-29T14:34:55.037-07:00Me and my boys<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/1600/z/565530/image-upload-36-794133.jpg"><img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/300/z/260950/image-upload-36-794133.jpg"/></a><br /><span/><br /></div>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-76963288619403284292007-04-27T09:51:00.001-07:002007-04-27T09:53:09.692-07:00Doctor B<p>Yesterday, I had to take Caleb to the paed. </p> <p>About 3 weeks ago he had an ear infection, bla bla, and today he had to go and check if the fluid in his ears had drained. I forgot ALL about it. Until about 9:45am. His appointment was at 11am. He finishes school at 12 noon.</p> <p>I dropped Ewan at work, raced home (while obeying the speed limit of <em>course </em>love...) *hides her TWO latest fines under the table* pulled into woolies, found they didn't have anything I wanted. Raced home, arrived at 10:05am, gave Dan, leisurely-milk-drinker McPhail a quick snack, brush my insane hair, give the fill-in maid lunch, pack the nappy bag with the 'kit' for going to the paed and leave the house by 10:20am. </p> <p>On the way out of the house, i opened the fridge to pack the going to the paed kit, to get snacks and i managed to knock out one of the shelves with the baby-bag. It happened to be....that's right, the shelf with the eggs and chocolate sprinkles on it. argh. Egg and chocolate ants all over my shoes, my ginger mary 3/4 pants, the floor, the fridge front, the baby bag, the baby. I thought that the fill-in maid was going to wet her pants she was laughing so hard. She stopped laughing tho, when i told her that she would have to clean it up seeing as i was now late for the doctor!</p> <p>I then start running up the stairs in my house, with Dan under one arm, and i think i squeezed his tummy a bit because he proceeded to vom <em>into</em> the baby bag and onto the toys and mango slices. The baby vom also ran all down my, all ready eggy and chocolate anty ginger mary 3/4 pants, and shoes. It is now 10:30am. The appointment is at 11am. I still have to collect Caleb from school.</p> <p>I arrive at school at 10:40ish, grab Caleb, hurl him into the car, strap him and head off down the m13. All the way he is asking me these ridiculous questions about why he is leaving school early, and 'where are we going mommy?' and 'why are we going to see Dr Botha and not Dr Manjra mommy?' and 'Does Dr Botha have suckers?' etc etc etc ad nauseam. Eventually we settle on the fact that he likes Dr Botha and Dr Manjra, and that he will have a sucker and that he won't cry. Oh yes, and also he will ask Dr B if his ears are working properly.</p> <p>I arrive at Westville Hospital at 10:55am. I pluck the kids from the car and RUN up the stairs and down the corridor to Dr Botha's office....puffing and panting and wheezing, i open the door and.....he is not even in yet. The waiting room is full of snotty, whingey little kiddies and their even whingier parents. Great. Just Great. I announce our presence and ask the receptionist if we can go and get some lunch and come back. There are 3 people in front of me so obviously it's not a problem.</p> <p>Off we go, back to the car to get the pram, strap Dan in and off we go to the hospital restaurant (which is actually rather nice). Have some food (ie i ate a salad and tried to stop Caleb from completely mutilating his cheese and tomato sarmie.) We went back up to the doctors office at 12:00. </p> <p>We sat down and start the loong wait. I bought Caleb a kids magazine to try and keep him entertained, and suddenly, every single other kid in the waiting room realises that he has....A TOY and a book.....they descend on our little corner, like a group of hungry vulchers who have just spied a particularly tasty morsel of dead something. Caleb, is not impressed. He puffs out his chest and starts to turn the pages quickly and in random directions (ie just to make sure that no-one can understand what he's doing or derive any enjoyment out of his book). 12:30 comes and goes. 13:00 comes...and goes........13:30 comes...and Dan needs a feed. So i take him into the filing cupboard (ie the room for us poor breastfeeding moms) and feed him. Meanwhile, Caleb is opening the cupboards and rifling through other peoples stuff and then...he starts grunting. </p> <p>'MOMMY !! So now i have a poo!' Great. I've left the nappy bag in the car. Quickly de-latch Dan who is quite pissed off by this whole delatching thing and run with Caleb under my arm, to the car, grab the nappy bag, run back upstairs, inform the receptionist that i am now back....'i'm sorry but you've just missed your slot, i've put someone else in in front of you.' great. Change Caleb's nappy and then sit and wait some more. 14:00 comes....and goes. </p> <p>EVENTUALLY at 14:25 Dr Botha comes out and says 'Master Caleb' and does his weird little giggle. I am ready to get cross and say something nasty and i can feel my blood boiling and i sit down at his desk and before i can open my mouth he says 'Do you mind i if i just sneak out for a piddle?' i can't say anything i just nod and he lets himself out of his office back door. He comes back in 10 minutes later and gives me this HUGE grin and says 'Hullo Master Caleb, how are you?' and then he starts talking to me and asking questions and is so completely interested in my little boys, like there are no other children on earth that matter, just my boys. And instantly, all my frustrations disappear and i realise what a fantastic doctor he is and why i really don't mind waiting for him because one day it might be one of my kids that he needs to spend 3 hours with in an emergency situation.</p> <p>We spent about 45 minutes in his office, chatting about Dan and his eating habits and my lack of sleep and everything else i was concerned about. I left and i felt like i only waited for half an hour!</p> <p>What an amazing man. And i know that when i next have to go and see him, i will feel exactly the same frustrations while i'm waiting and will leave completely satisfied and will forget about the wait.</p> <p>The best things truely do come to those who wait.</p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-67437363213281319552007-04-24T01:12:00.001-07:002007-04-24T01:12:18.886-07:00Shewee.....i kid you not.....<p>In my perusings this morning i came across this little gem.</p> <p>It's called a '<a href="http://www.shewee.com" target="_blank">Shewee</a>'. Honestly, i do not speak a word of lie, there is a product out there called a 'Shewee'. *kackle* What makes it even more entertaining is that it was invented by someone called 'Samantha Fountain' HAHAHHAHHAH.</p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Shewee.....ikidyounot_877E/shewee3.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="200" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Shewee.....ikidyounot_877E/shewee_thumb1.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a> </p> <p>Basically it's a little bit of oddly shaped plastic that allows you to wee standing up. </p> <p>I'm sorry but i just don't get it. I mean i do get it obviously, but, on the website they use phrases like 'stand up and take control' and my personal favourite 'Shewee doesn't just offer equality with men, but is a real and revolutionary device which will change women's lives.' wow. I didn't know that being able to wee standing would make me equal to men!! Hurrah! My prayers have been answered!! Finally someone has come up with the answer to all women's issues! Why didn't anyone think of this before? All through the years where women have been oppressed, they were missing the solution all along....wee standing up! Duh. </p> <p>*shakes head*</p> <p>Then of course, you have the care instructions:-</p> <p>'If you would like to wash the Shewee; once you get home the Shewee can go in the washing machine with your undies, be washed by hand in warm soapy water or even go in the dishwasher!' OH MY hat how revolting. That's like sticking your toilet bowl in the dishwasher with all your cutlery.</p> <p>I have nothing against this invention, and i'm sure for sports people it's like a dream come true. But for flips sake. Equality to men my arse. I wonder if it does world peace too?</p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-58931613445029058312007-04-23T12:59:00.001-07:002007-04-23T12:59:25.707-07:00What a kak day.<p>Today has been one of those days where i actually just wish i could have stayed in bed all day. (Obviously that would involve attaching my children to the bed somehow so they couldn't run off and stick their fingers in plugs or anything.) </p> <p>I suppose, it wasn't <em>actually</em> that bad when i think about it now...but still i just feel like having a bit of a moan.</p> <p>My domestic worker (not that she is actually any good anyway.) hasn't been to work for a month. She is ill. She has a mate who comes and works for me a couple of days a week while my lady is off and today she was busy. Which means that i woke up and like threw myself into housework. My amazing husband takes Dan with on the school run so that i get 30 minutes of 'no-kid in the house' time. Usually i spend it making my breakfast, and Dan's and showering and getting dressed and drying my hair. You know all the things that mom's don't get to do anymore! This morning i spent it frantically putting on washing and unloading the dishwasher etc etc. I also spent Dan's naptime tidying and cleaning and sorting washing. I don't really mind but i have spent a month doing it myself and i'm over it now. In fact, i am avoiding a mile-high pile of ironing that is taunting me as we speak.</p> <p>Soo, then off i go to do the shopping etc which is always the highlight of my otherwise dull day. Then i picked up Caleb from school, and had a hilarious conversation with him on the way to my mom's house. I don't really like being alone in the afternoons, i get very lonely and very bored without <em>any</em> other adult person to talk to, so i try go to my mom's when i don't have a domestic worker. My parent's don't really appreciate this. *sigh* I spent the whole day feeling like i was a complete nuisance. My dad didn't talk to me for the whole afternoon and whenever my mother did, she was just all like grumpy with me. I don't know why. Grandparents are supposed to *want* you to come over. So that made me sad. I don't understand why it always has to be like a fight when i need them. I help them whenever i can, in fact, even when they don't ask for help i will go out of my way to do nice stuff for them. Ag bla bla bla listen to me whinge.</p> <p>Anyway, the one excellent thing that happened today was Caleb wearing undies ALL AFTERNOON!! Hooray. I am so proud of the little guy. He wee'd in the toilet like such a little star and was soo proud of himself. He finishes weeing and then shakes his 'bit' and states loudly 'There is no more wee in my bit!' and then toddles off feeling happy. What a cutey.</p> <p>So then i get home and made dinner (lamb chops, cauliflower and pumpkin mash' and i decided to get really smart and make supper for tomorrow night while i was cooking (butternut soup). So i got it on the stove and while i'm cooking i discover that i have frozen my LAST two litre coke light (that stuff is like gold, i'm SO annoyed at myself) anyway. Then we start eating and the soup smells great, and then, it stops smelling great...........</p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Whatakakday_13228/butternutstodge2.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="180" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Whatakakday_13228/butternutstodge_thumb.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a> </p> <p>I'm getting a new pot for my birthday on Wednesday!!</p> <p>The perfect end, to the perfect day.</p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-82123830148562100272007-04-22T08:13:00.000-07:002007-04-22T08:52:59.344-07:00I am a ginger mary whore.<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/1600/z/352060/image-upload-36-703294.jpg"><img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/300/z/70186/image-upload-36-703294.jpg" /></a><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">This is a pic of me in my birthday gifts from my husband. He sent me to shop! (i love my husband) So i bought, a Ginger Mary top, some Ginger Mary Jeans that make my bum look like you could bounce a coin off it (YEE HAA) and a Ginger Mary jersey. </span></div><div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span></div><div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><span style="font-family:georgia;">*bliss*</span></div><div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span></div><div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><span style="font-family:georgia;">I love Ginger Mary clothes.</span> </div><p><span style="font-size:0;"></p><div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><br /></div><br /></span>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com33tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-13532908829817708062007-04-22T04:08:00.000-07:002007-04-22T04:06:53.839-07:00I dont want anymore lunch! Dammit!<div xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/1600/z/405697/image-upload-9-712827.jpg"><img src="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/4225/295623606891193/300/z/387891/image-upload-9-712827.jpg"/></a><br /><span/><br /></div>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2421748587652657281.post-3869708762541901022007-04-16T13:37:00.001-07:002007-04-16T13:37:02.804-07:00I've got cake up my bum!<p>Caleb comes up with the weirdest things sometimes. I'd like to know what on earth he is smoking because i think we all need a bit of whatever he's got.</p> <p>I've complied a list of my favourite of his little outbursts.</p> <p>Caleb tries his hand at deductive reasoning:-</p> <blockquote> <p><font color="#880044">Cows make milk.....*pause for thought* </font></p> <p><font color="#880044">Mommy makes milk for Daniel.....*pause for thought*</font></p> <p><font color="#880044">Mommy is a cow!!</font></p></blockquote> <p>Caleb while bathing, and making his own...er bubbles:-</p> <blockquote> <p><font color="#880044">I made a fart! There are no more farts in my bum. It's empty! Daddy must put some more in!!</font></p></blockquote> <p>Caleb on being asked if he'd like some more cake:-</p> <blockquote> <p><font color="#880044">No thanks, I've got cake up my bum!</font></p></blockquote> <p>Caleb tries his hand at deductive reasoning again:-</p> <blockquote> <p><font color="#880044">God made me.</font></p> <p><font color="#880044">God made Dan-Dan</font></p> <p><font color="#880044">God made a brother for me</font></p> <p><font color="#880044">God made mommy</font></p> <p><font color="#880044">God made daddy</font></p> <p><font color="#880044">I'm a special monkey!</font></p> <p><font color="#880044">God made mommy a special monkey.....ME!!</font></p></blockquote> <p>Caleb tries story telling:-</p> <blockquote> <p><font color="#880044">Once upon a time, name oogli. </font></p></blockquote> <p>While watering himself with the hosepipe:-</p> <blockquote> <p><font color="#880044">I'm growing bigger, like mommy and daddy!</font></p></blockquote> <p>Caleb tries manipulation:-</p> <blockquote> <p><font color="#880044">Daddy, i put the stripey toy up my nose, so we can go to the doctor! You will come home now daddy?</font></p></blockquote> <p>*pOp* <- dammit. there go my ovaries again.</p> <p> </p> <p><a href="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Ivegotcakeupmybum_13B3E/DSCN43732.jpg" atomicselection="true"><img style="border-right: 0px; border-top: 0px; border-left: 0px; border-bottom: 0px" height="180" src="http://clair.ewanscorner.com/blog-images/Ivegotcakeupmybum_13B3E/DSCN4373_thumb.jpg" width="240" border="0"></a></p>Clairhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11452917244052500175noreply@blogger.com1