*psst* have you got any butternut soup?

*Sigh*
It's like 20 past 2 in the afternoon and i have been awake for 11 hours all ready! Surely that should be illegal? I think my children are on a mission to kill me......one day Caleb is going to pin me down and Dan Dan is gonna drown me in dribble, okay so it may take a while and the flaw in the plan is that children are impatient, there is hope! Either that, or i'll die of sleep deprivation, can you die from sleep deprivation? *ponders*

So anyway, it's one of my favourite kind of days, i suspect some people would think that this kind of weather is gloomy, i love it. I like nothing better than to wake up, look out of the window and see the sky in a gorgeous shade of satin grey, and feel that refreshing chill in the air when i get out of bed. It really just charges my batteries, makes me feel so alive!

Today is one of those days, it could be a little bit colder, but then that would be pushing my luck! Afterall this is summer...in DURBAN..ie HOT. God really customized today for me. So anyway, i decided to try some butternut soup from this smoothie, vegan, organic, whatever shop in the shopping centre i frequent, i'm always too nervous to go in there alone, there are never any customers in there and the guy behind the counter is just a little bit borderline....anway, so i pushed the double pram containing 1 x bored 2 year old and 1 x sleeping 6 month old into the shop and wait for the large fussy lady infront of me to finish deciding whether or not the sandwich she is ordering will be big enough for her, obviously not, she orders two. Then, and this should have been my first warning sign, she asks if he can do a chicken mayo sandwich for her daughter, so he thinks for about half an hour and says 'unfortunately we dont have mayo.' so she says, 'really? no mayo at all?' he says 'no but i can make a tzaziki sauce with cucumber and yoghurt.' she says no but she wont eat that so he says 'oh, how about beef?' (because beef is so like mayo?) so she says 'no, i want chicken mayo' he says 'i dont have any, how about tzaziki sauce?' this goes on for a while and eventually she settles for cheese and tomato. so she pays and waits hungrily in the corner rubing her trotters together with glee at the thought of her TWO mediterrannean chicken sarmies.

Anyway so i ask if they have any butternut soup. A simple question, i thought, i mean it's ON the menu.....so the guy looks at me for a few moments (obviously this is a loaded question and i'm actually asking for weed/an illegal weapon) and says 'i'm sorry unfortunately we only have one portion left, and the chicken and coconut soup hasn't stood for long enough.' right. this is not a good start. 'So, is the last portion of butternut soup that you have left for sale?' he ponders this briefly 'yes he says, the coconut and chicken soup hasn't stood for long enough yet.' (what is it with this damn coconut and chicken soup?!?!) 'Okay, thanks can i take that please, and a small strawberry juice. Oh and do you have a bag of some description that i can put it in' (seeing as i'm pushing the pram and carrying some packets) Obviously that was just like information overload. 'Woah,' he says, hopping frantically around behind the counter (he has a broken leg) 'unfortunately we only have brown paper bags' GOOD GRIEF!?!!? what has this dude been smoking?? 'That will be fine, could i have one please?' he stares at me blankly for about 8 seconds, sweat is starting to form on his forehead.....'what for?' at this point i really feel like saying 'so that i can chop you up into bits and put you in it' but i don't, i just smile sweetly, and say 'to carry my juice and soup, i have a lot to carry' he looks relieved and says 'sure,' and laughs a little, then hops back to the smoothie machine.

Another lady walks in and orders a lentil soup. I was curious to see what effect this would have on the guy, surprisingly he says 'sure' (obviously lentil soup is something he can easily identify), and she goes and sits down. 5 minutes later he calls her over and hands her a bag. She says 'oh' and he says 'oh did you want to eat here?' she says 'ya, thats why i was sitting there' he says 'sorry m'am unfortunately, we dont have any bowls...'

At this point im wondering if the soup just gets poured straight into the brown paper bag. I think she is too, she eyes the bag suspiciously, opens it up and takes out a plastic cup thing with the soup in it, she goes and sits down and eats her soup. By now the large lady is drooling, I am beginning to feel concerned for the safety of my babies delicate little thighs, she might, afterall mistake them for chicken wings or some other delectable item. I get my soup and juice in a bag, and leave, quickly he says 'bye' and waves enthusiastically. i dont.

So i get to the car and have a look at my soup, which is not properly blended. yum. So i have some, and give my 2 year old a bit, which he proceeded to spit all over the car - he did not approve.

It was, i will admit, good soup, a bit lumpy, but tasty. Next time, i'm going in there and i'm going to order something completely weird that's not on the menu and watch him squirm......i'm a stay at home mum..............i don't get out much........